I don't know where to really begin. I guess I'll start out by saying that things are going pretty well. I'm hopefully moving out Saturday, even though I don't have an apartment yet. Oops.... haha. I'm not stressing though. I know that everything will work out just fine.
Earlier, I felt like crying. I had so many things building up, but I'm not going to stress out. Even though I want to cry and complain to someone, I know I'm stronger than that. I just have to deal with all of this on my own. I'm almost 20 years old. It's time I start acting like it, right??
One good thing has happened today.... Wait for it...... I realized that I CAN move on from my past. I've been holding onto something that was only causing me pain. I was so lost in that hurt and confusion that I didn't really see what I had right in front of me. That changed last night. I know that I have to let go. It's hurting me and I don't want that anymore. I have something now in my life that is 2000 times better than this ever was. I guess I was letting my fear of getting hurt stand in the way. Not anymore. I'm going to move on like I should have done forever ago.
I don't know where my life is going. I'm tired of trying to plan everything out and watching it fall right in front of me. I'm not going to think so much about it. I'm going to just let it happen. I might end up leaving behind college for a while. I just have to do what makes me happy. I can't believe I was trying so hard to please everyone. It did nothing, but hurt me. I'm going to live for me. I'm not going to regret things anymore. If I make mistakes, oh well. I'll just move on and learn from it. No more hiding. I'm going to be me.
No comments:
Post a Comment