Where Did You Go?

Confusion.... Welcome to my life. I always seem to be confused about the situations going on.... Without really telling the situation, I'll let you know that I've been praying about something for months. It's one of those things where I say that I'm completely done and I pray.... And then the exact opposite happens. Why? Honestly, I have no idea. I feel like most of the time when I pray about it though, I'm being told not to give up and not be done with it. That scares me. I have people who think I'm crazy for being in this and part of me agrees. A small part. I just have that reassurance that it's the right thing though. When I try to turn my back on it, it shows up again. What does that even mean? I cry and cry when I try to be done... It's pathetic.... I think it's because in my heart, I know that this is supposed to be in my life....